It’s a New Year…

Yes, I know we’re already almost a week into 2017, and this blog post might have been better if it was posted, say, last week. But I’ve been really busy, and now I need closure on the year that was 2016, so screw you and your judgemental opinions! Here’s a rundown of my last year. Month. By. Month…

January

In true Demeter style (I’ll try to refer to myself less in the third person this year, promise), I started the year off in a sling. Typical. I also went to Hawaii in January, so it wasn’t all bad…

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February

This month is really just a big blur… I probably just slept through it, to be honest.

March

I had shoulder surgery (again) to hopefully fix my dodgy shoulder for good this time!

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April

I was made redundant (well, look at that – there really is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow…) and I celebrated my birthday – in a sling. For the second consecutive year.

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May

Still slingin’ it…

June

I started working as a freelance journalist, which has been interesting… Not having a steady income has been bad. But finally getting that whole work/life balance thing down has been good.

July

Lots of physiotherapy on my shoulder. And sleep.

August

See July.

September

I announce I’m moving to the USA after qualifying for a Green Card… Shit just got real.

October

This month was really just one big farewell party. Oh, and my sister turned 30, so more parties…

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November

I flew to America with my mum in tow and proceeded to set myself up for a life in sunny California.

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December

Turns out California isn’t so sunny after all… Also, it’s cold! Why is it so cold here?! My friend, Cathie flies into LA and spends Christmas and New Years with me. In return, I show her the sights and let her use up all my toilet paper.

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I have no idea what 2017 will bring, but so far it’s been interesting… Here’s hoping for a happy new year! xx

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There’s No Place Like Home…

Moving to LA has given me a new appreciation for Sydney and Australia – one I almost certainly wouldn’t have developed if I’d never left.

Having been born and raised in Sydney, I spent my first 33 years there, and – especially recently – certain things were starting to grate on me. The increase in crowds seemingly EVERYWHERE (Seriously, do people have nothing better to do than drive around for 45 minutes looking for a parking spot, only to then line up for an hour to order an overpriced and overhyped gelato?!), the endless traffic (It’s Sunday, people! Get off the roads!), unaffordable housing (So, I guess I’ll just live at home forever…), the high cost of living (“$16 for a toasted cheese sandwich?! Is it cheaper if you don’t toast it?!”), the high rise apartments popping up everywhere (Oh, look – another crane…), expensive and unreliable public transport (Signal failure? Again? Really?), the pretentious douchebags mixed in with our heavy drinking culture (“I’m gonna get really pissed tonight!” said no American ever), and an out of touch government (If we all ate less avocado smash, we’d be able to afford houses apparently. Problem solved. You’re welcome, Australia!)

You get the idea… Sydney was beginning to feel incredibly hostile. I was drained, exhausted, and tired of fighting a battle I felt destined to lose. It was time for a change. Time to step out of the bubble, get off the treadmill and set off on a new adventure…

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What I didn’t expect though was just how much I would actually miss Sydney. It turns out my old foe was actually also my friend. Let’s just call us frienemies… And while I’m sure all the things that aggravated me about Sydney haven’t changed, putting some distance between us has made me able to appreciate the good things!

For one, it really is one of the most beautiful cities in the world, something which is easy to take for granted when you’re constantly surrounded by it. It’s also clean! That was one of the things I found most shocking when I first arrived in LA – there’s so much rubbish littering the streets here.

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Collectively, we’re also incredibly laidback and friendly. No problem is ever too big for Australians (except for legalising gay marriage and accepting refugees, but that’s another blog post…). I noticed this while attending a movie screening in Hollywood with my Aussie friend, Tade recently. The lady on the door was being especially snappy with all of the guests. Her rudeness was actually shocking to me.

“Well, she seems delightful,” I murmured to Tade.

“Are people still nice in Australia?” Tade replied excitedly. “Oh my God! They are, aren’t they?!”

Tade has been living in LA for two-and-a-half years, and in that time, she hasn’t gone home once. She said even just listening to my accent was making her homesick.

“I’m going home in January, and I can’t wait!” she told me. “The first thing I’m going to do is stick my head under the tap and drink the water!”

“What’s wrong with the water here?!” I asked her, a rising level of panic in my voice.

“You haven’t been drinking the water, have you?!” she shot back.

“Yes!” I practically shouted at her.

No one drinks the water in LA! Everyone drinks bottled water!”

More than an hour later, I was still obsessing about the water situation… No wonder I’d had a funny stomach for the last four weeks. What the f***, America?! This is a first world country!

“I just ran into Nicole Kidman in the toilet!” Tade told me after returning from the bathroom.

“That’s great… Seriously, what’s wrong with the water?!” I asked her again.

The film just so happened to be an Aussie movie called Lion. There was a scene where one of the characters says, “Australia is a great place!” That was it – I was gone. Tears started streaming down my face, as I silently told myself, “It really is.” I cried even more when the camera panned across the iconic Australian landscape.

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A few days ago, I went into Bath & Body Works – a shop in the US.

“Are you Australian?” the shop assistant asked me.

“What gives me away? Is it my accent or my Akubra hat?” I replied.

Despite the fact I was being a smart ass, we spoke for a bit, and she told me how she’d lived in Sydney for seven years. I asked her if she’d ever move back there.

“No, because my family and friends are here – this is my home,” she explained. “This is where I belong.”

“I know exactly what you mean,” I told her.

I’ve met some amazing people in my short time here, and I know I’ll meet some more along the way, but they don’t erase the family and friends I have waiting for me back home. As cheesy as it sounds, home is where the heart is, and – much to my surprise – my heart is still very much in Australia.

So while I’m determined to make the most of my adventure in the US, I know that one day I will return home, and Sydney and I will just have to find a way to get along. Because even though you’re beautiful, you don’t have to be a bitch about it, Sydney…

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My So-Called Glamorous Life

An update of what I’ve been up to in LA over the last week…

1. I’ve been watching a lot of Friends. You know, because no one told me life was gonna be this way…

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2. I’ve also been watching the new Gilmore Girls series, and it’s freaking me out how relatable Rory’s life is to me right now. (Especially because everyone is like, “Get your shit together, Rory.”)

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3. I’ve spent a lot of time applying for jobs in the hope that I will land one soon. Mainly because I really like money, and it makes me cry when I don’t have any.

4. I’m also starting to wonder if maybe I should have ticked “yes” instead of “no” on the visa application form where it asked, “Would you ever engage in prostitution?” Looking back, it seems like it could have been a job opportunity. Plus, things worked out okay for Julia Roberts – she met Richard Gere and eventually won an Oscar.

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5. I did some washing, but I didn’t have enough money left on my laundry card to dry it, so I had to lay my clothes and towels out all over my apartment, open the windows and let the sun and air dry it. I think the neighbours think I’m running a laundromat out of my apartment, which is probably one of the best business ideas I’ve had in a really long time.

6. A guy pushed in front of me at Starbucks, and my instinct was to cry. In hindsight, this was probably a gross overreaction. I should have just kicked him in the groin and run away. But I was feeling lonely and I’d just received a bill addressed to “Gemeter Stamell”, so I was extremely vulnerable. Also, I really hope Starbucks screwed up his order. Karma, bitch!

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7. Immediately after this, I went to the supermarket to pick up some milk, bread and bagels. I handed the lady at the cash register a $20 bill, and she snapped at me and told me I needed to unfold it for her. I told her that I’d be able to unfold it for her if my arms weren’t full of milk, bread and bagels, but since she wanted to charge me for a plastic bag, she’d have to unfold it herself. Then I lugged my groceries home. Without a bag.

8. I went to my friend, Rachel’s 30th birthday, where I got to talk to some of her lovely friends. I told them it was the most face-to-face interaction I’d had with anyone since talking to the cashier at Best Buy on Wednesday. Rachel’s party was on Friday night.

9. I had the following conversation with Rachel’s friend, Eliza…

Me: “What am I doing with my life?!”

Eliza: “What do you mean?! You’re taking a chance! Do you know how brave you are?! So many people don’t have the guts to do this! When I was 18, I decided I wanted to move to Israel, so I did.”

Me: “How did that work out for you?”

Eliza: “Hated it. I moved back after a month. But at least I tried! Just give it a go!”

Me: “Well, I didn’t buy four plates and four glasses for nothing.”

10. I realised just how Australian I really am (I’d seriously never noticed before), when I dropped the terms “budgie smuggler” and “goon bag” within minutes of each other while having lunch with my new American friend, Amanda. (And I’ve never been prouder.)

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11. I broke down in hysterical tears again while FaceTiming with my friend, Sarah in Australia. I seem to be crying a lot these days. It’s like whoever is in charge of my emotions is punishing me for hardly ever crying over the last 33 years. I’ve seen Inside Out. I know how this works.

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Making a Move

You may have noticed I’ve been MIA for a while. It’s been more than two months since I last posted. So, what happened? Life. Life happened.

In my last blog post, I announced that I was moving overseas to America. Well, that day has come and I am now settled in LA. (Disneyland won out. Not that I’ve even had time to go to Disneyland…)

To say I was naïve about just how hard moving overseas would be is an understatement. I feel like I’ve aged about 20 years in the three weeks I’ve been here! I’m not even kidding. I went down to San Diego last week for Thanksgiving with my family, and in one of the photos my aunt, Penny took of me, I noticed my right eye was drooping. “Oh my God!” I yelled. “Did I have a stroke and not even realise it?!”

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Said droopy eye photo…

See, the thing is, in the weeks before I left Sydney, my life was one big farewell party. Literally. I’d never been more popular. I was out almost every day and night, catching up with friends, laughing, having fun, and generally trying not to think too much about the enormity of what I was about to do. Nobody does avoidance like me! Nobody! I knew that if I stopped and actually considered things, there was a very real possibility I wouldn’t get on the plane.

The only time I cried before leaving Sydney was when my 17-year-old cousin, Sini broke down in tears while saying goodbye to me. And this was probably only because she’s some sort of teen witch who has cast a spell on me, causing me to cry whenever she does.

I flew into LA with my mum in tow, and we hit the ground running. Our to-do list was long, and it kept getting longer as I encountered good ol’ American bureaucracy. I won’t bore you with the details, but it was a long, hard slog, and I may have thrown a tantrum or six along the way.

In just three weeks – with the help of my oh-so-patient mum – I’d opened a US bank account, set myself up with a US phone number, found an apartment, signed a lease, fully furnished an apartment, opened electricity and gas accounts, set my apartment up with internet and moved in. Am I missing anything? Probably. So when my dad asked me over the phone if I’d found a job yet, I wanted to punch him in the mouth. He was back in Sydney though, so, you know, geography prevented it.

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Mood.

“People have no idea!” I seethed to Mum. Despite what you’ve seen on Instagram, let me assure you all – this has not been a holiday. I would have uploaded photos of my bank manager or the girl at AT&T, but I didn’t think it was appropriate.

Still, it hadn’t fully hit me. I was still so busy running around, doing stuff, preparing to move, that I hadn’t even had time to think about moving – until yesterday. Last night, my mum flew back to Sydney, and I finally had my “Oh, shit,” moment. (It took a while, but I got there.)

At the last minute, I decided to go out to LAX with Mum to say goodbye. I sat silently in the backseat, staring out the window and crying, all the way from Burbank to LAX (which is a really long drive, by the way, especially in peak hour/post Thanksgiving traffic). After sobbing through one last hug at the airport, I climbed back into the backseat of the black SUV (yes, I’ve gone full Hollywood), and continued to cry all the way back to Burbank. My poor driver (Hector Elizondo in every role he’s ever played) didn’t know what to say or do to make me feel better, so he kindly offered me a bottle of water, allowed me to choose the radio station, and then told me about how much he missed his homeland, Armenia.

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Literally my driver. (Just kidding – this actually is Hector Elizondo.)

After letting myself back into my apartment, the quietness startled me, and that unleashed the big, heaving sobs. I suddenly realised I was all by myself in a big city, and almost everyone I loved was on the other side of the world. What the hell am I doing here?! I even miss my cat, and she’s a bitch.

I’m trying to stay positive, and I know it will get easier, but I’ll be honest – right now, it’s tough. Really tough. The other week, I was at Nordstrom at The Grove. I was at the checkout, making a purchase, and the sales assistant kept telling me how “adorable” my accent is. “I love the Aussie accent!” she said. “You could be swearing and telling me off right now, and I would just think it’s the cutest thing in the world.” We spoke for a while, I told her I was moving here, and she told me to come back and see her if I ever needed a friend. At the time, I thought I’d never see that girl ever again, and now I’m actually considering it.

This morning I woke up and cleaned my already clean apartment, just to keep myself busy, then I checked my long overdue emails and started looking for work. It’s all about keeping myself distracted at this point, so I don’t just curl up in bed with the jar of Trader Joe’s Cookie Butter I bought and continue to cry.

But, I know that sunny days are coming… Aside from the fact I’m in California (which has been having an unusual amount of rain lately), I’m yet to meet anyone who has regretted doing a stint overseas. Everyone I’ve ever spoken to has found their lives enriched by the experience, and say it’s one of the best things they’ve ever done. I’m not there yet, but it’s still early days.

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Here comes the sun…

Coming to America

I have some really big news. It’s somewhere in between the moon landing and the discovery that there are now dark chocolate Kit Kats… To quote Julia Roberts, “Big. HUGE.”

I’m moving to America**! (**Depending on how it works out, this might just be an extended holiday, in which case, I’ll see you all in a couple of months.)

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My close friends and family know this has been on the cards for some time, and now it’s finally here!

I doubt this will be much of a surprise to anyone… On average, I’ve been travelling to the US at least once a year since 2007. My grandfather has even asked me if I have a secret African American boyfriend over there. “Well, you know what they say, Papou,” I told him. “Once you go Black, you never go back.” (By the way, it doesn’t sound half as catchy in Greek.)

I love it there! I feel American in my soul. Every time I visit, it feels like home. (Except in Florida. That place is a shit hole and no one should EVER go there!) When I left LA last year, I was holding back the tears at the airport. The only thing that got me through was knowing I was going to the One Direction concert a couple of days after I got back to Sydney… For real.

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Damn you, Zayn!

Finally, after years of travelling back and forth, the stars aligned, and I won a Green Card through the visa lottery! Whenever I tell people I’ve been gifted with a US Green Card, the most common response is: “Oh my God! That is so exciting!” Yeah… But it’s also shit-your-pants terrifying and stressful.

This is without a doubt the scariest thing I have ever done, but I am so incredibly grateful and blessed to have this opportunity, and I know I would be completely – not just a little bit – insane to let it pass me by. It would be like winning the Golden Ticket to Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory and then saying, “Nah, I don’t really feel like chocolate anymore.” (Also, I really hope they have chocolate rivers in America, although I’ve been there enough times to know they don’t.) I don’t want to have any regrets. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

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That said, the whole thing is really starting to stress me out, maybe more than I even realise… (If anyone knows of a stress-free way to neatly pack up your life and move it overseas, please, do tell.) For the last few days, my jaw has been really tight and sore. The last time this happened, the doctor told me I had been clenching my jaw and grinding my teeth in my sleep. He prescribed me muscle relaxants and Valium. And just the other night, I woke up in tears for no apparent reason.

Don’t get me wrong – this is something I’ve wanted ever since my parents took my sister and I on a nine-week road trip across America when I was 11 years old. They really only have themselves to blame for this… But I’m not going to sugar-coat it. Leaving behind everything you know and everyone you love is really f***ing hard!

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The enormity of what I am about to do has well and truly dawned on me, and I am under no false illusions as to just how difficult and challenging it will be. (Also, by constantly telling myself how difficult it will be, I’m hoping it will be easy.) I was for a little bit, but I’m definitely not anymore…

I remember talking to a guy at a party about my Green Card. “It’s not going to be like on Friends,” he told me, matter-of-factly. “It’s going to be really, really hard! You’re not going to be living in Monica and Rachel’s apartment, spending your days drinking coffee at Central Perk with Ross and the gang. You’ll probably end up living in a tiny, rat-infested apartment, stressing about how you’re going to pay the rent.” This guy was a real buzzkill. “I know that!” came my annoyed reply, along with a slight roll of my eyes. But my internal dialogue sounded more like this: “OH, SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!! @#$%&^!!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING, DEMETER?!”

The reality is, up until that moment, I actually did think my life in New York City would resemble a Friends episode, complete with Phoebe playing “Smelly Cat” in a hip-but-quaint café. (Yes, I know she’s not a real person.) Not anymore. Thanks, Party Guy!

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Which brings me to my next dilemma – NYC or LA? I’m still not sure where I’ll live, and this is stressing people (specifically my mum) out.

NYC Pros:

  • It’s NYC!
  • There’s a slight possibility Jake Gyllenhaal will come and stand next to me while I’m snoozing on the subway. (There’s also a larger possibility that he won’t, and I’ll be mugged while snoozing on the subway.)

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NYC Cons:

  • It’s super expensive, and I’m not so sure a rat-infested shoebox can be considered “bang for your buck”.

LA Pros:

  • The weather – it’s almost always warm in LA.
  • Disneyland! (ANNUAL PASS, BITCHES!!)

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LA Cons:

  • You have to drive everywhere, which means I’m going to have to marry an Uber driver. Or buy a car…

So that I don’t COMPLETELY freak myself out, I’m trying to put as little pressure on myself as possible. My plan is to tough it out for a year, but I’ll go over there and see what it’s like. Living somewhere is very different to holidaying there – same shit, different scenery. If it doesn’t work out/if Trump gets elected President, I’ll come back early after doing some travelling. If it does work out, I might stay longer. Either way, I won’t be gone forever – I promise, Mum!

Aside from the fact I’m going to miss my friends and family more than I can even put into words, all of my stuff is here, and I really like my stuff. Plus, there’s only so much you can pack into two 23-kilo suitcases.

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If anyone has any tips or suggestions, please send them my way – I feel like I’m navigating this one blindfolded. (Pleeeease tell me how to live my life!) Also, if anyone knows of any media jobs going or any apartments, please let me know. Central Park is great and everything, but I don’t really want to wind up sleeping on a bench there…

So, what’s next? Well, my tickets are booked, and I will be flying into LA on November 3 with my mum, who is going to help me get settled/make sure I don’t completely freak out like the time I tried to do a runner when I got my ears pierced. I was 21, by the way. (True story.)

My friend, Lea has suggested I have a going away party on Saturday, October 22 – mainly because she was free on this date. (She literally asked me if I would be able to make it, which was thoughtful and considerate of her.) I would love to see you all there – even if I’ve never even met you. There’s no time like the present, right? More details will follow soon.

Just promise you won’t forget about me when I’m gone. As for me, I’ve already forgotten half of your names. (Kidding.)

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Dear Bachelor…

You may have noticed I have a lot of feelings about The Bachelor finale… Specifically rage.

I promised myself I wasn’t going to get sucked in by this pathetic excuse for a TV show – I was watching it strictly for work purposes only – but somewhere in between Richie mouthing off about “cool bananas”, I got hooked.

Apparently I wasn’t the only one either. Like the rest of Australia, I quickly found myself rooting for Nikki. In a group full of bitchy, desperate, jealous, attention-seeking drama queens, Nikki somehow managed to rise above all of it. Not only was she the best option for Richie, she was the only option.

Then he went and picked Alex, leaving Nikki – and the rest of Australia – heartbroken.

My therapist told me I should write it out. (Just kidding – I don’t have a therapist. Yet.) So, I’ve decided to write open letters to Richie, Alex and Nikki…

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Dear Richie,

You asshole.

I think I stand with the rest of Australia when I say you picked the wrong girl.

It’s fine. You have a right to pick whoever you like, but why did you lead Nikki on for so long? You knew she’d fallen for you. God knows she told you enough times that she was madly in love with you! She lit up like a neon sign whenever she was around you. To keep her around until the very last minute just to dump her on national TV was nothing less than cruel.

Especially since you later said you knew Alex was “the one” when you became aroused during your second kiss with her. I don’t have a penis, so I wouldn’t know, but is it really that powerful? I mean, really?

You went on this show saying that you were looking for someone you could spend the rest of your life with. Someone with who you could travel and share adventures with.

Well, guess what, Richie – Alex has a child. The closest you’re going to get to traveling now is taking him to and from school. As for adventures, does watching him throw a tantrum in the supermarket count?

I don’t know how you forgot about him, especially given that Alex mentioned him almost as many times as Nikki told you she loved you. And no, constantly referring to him as “the little fella” instead of by his name will not make him any less real. While we’re on the subject, I find it a little weird that you still haven’t met him, even though it’s been months since you told Alex you wanted to spend the rest of your life with her and her son. It seems to me like you’re a little bit in denial about the whole situation.

There’s no denying that what you had with Alex was steamy, but long-lasting relationships aren’t built solely on sex (and while we’re on the subject, good luck with that area when there’s a small child squeezed in between you both in bed). What you had with Alex is the stuff flings are made of. What you built with Nikki is the stuff of forever.

You said it yourself – everything with Nikki was so easy! The two of you just fit perfectly together. Your family loved her and vice versa, you live in close proximity to each other… And yet you still went ahead and chose Alex.

Good luck with everything, but something tells me you’ll wake up one day soon and realise you made a huge mistake.

Yours Sincerely,

Demeter

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Dear Alex,

Well played. You were out to win this thing from the very beginning, and you did exactly that.

But unlike Richie, I didn’t fall for your fake laugh and over exaggerated smile for one minute. Everything about you felt forced, fake and manipulative to me. Did you have a genuine moment the entire time you were on this show?

Also, you were so jealous and possessive! Let me remind you – you went on a dating show with 20-something other girls. This is not a show for jealous types.

But you won. So now what? Do you genuinely love Richie or are you just happy you came out on top? Are you going to sit Richie on your mantelpiece next to all of your other trophies?

Girls like you give the rest of us a bad reputation.

Yours Sincerely,

Demeter

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Dear Nikki,

You were too good for this show and definitely too good for Richie!

Don’t look back for one second. You exuded so much class, grace and elegance throughout this whole crazy circus, and you have such a sweet, good and pure heart. You were so real, open and honest! From what I saw, your only fault was that you put Richie’s happiness before your own!

So here is my advice. I know you are still heartbroken, but take this whole experience as a lesson. Grow from it, and don’t make the same mistakes twice. Learn to love yourself first and foremost, because you are enough!

Oh, and if Richie ever decides to come crawling back, make sure you tell him to shove his rose up his ass, thorny side up.

I wish you nothing but good things in life, because you deserve it.

With Love,

Demeter

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Modern Muses

Whenever people ask me who my role models are, I usually say, “Myself.” But the truth is I’m lucky enough to be surrounded by many, many inspiring women, who have all helped shaped the amazing person I am today. I’m even luckier to call them my family and friends.

And then there are those women who I don’t actually know, but who I look up to anyway. I’m sure it would be reciprocated if they knew I existed…

Julie Andrews

I realised something while watching Mary Poppins (again) the other night – Julie has a one of the kindest, gentlest faces you will ever see. No wonder she played a nanny in both Mary Poppins and The Sound of Music. I’d trust her with my kids, too. If I had any.

I was lucky enough to see Julie in person the other week, and she was everything I wanted her to be and then some more – gracious, elegant and funny! Fraulein Maria has a wicked sense of humour. I’m pretty sure that’s why she got kicked out of the convent…

And she’s so passionate about what she does – I could’ve listened to Julie talk all day.

At several times, I wanted to stand up in the Sydney Opera House auditorium and yell, “Adopt me, Julie!” But I could never imagine Julie Andrews raising her voice, and I didn’t want her to judge me. Also, I was sitting next to my mum, so that could have been awkward…

“Use your knowledge and your heart to stand up for those who can’t stand, speak for those who can’t speak, be a beacon of light for those whose lives have become dark.” – Julie Andrews

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Oprah Winfrey

True story – Oprah was a big part of the reason I became a journalist. I always wanted my own talk show, mainly so I could give out free cars…

I find everything she has accomplished in her life – and everything she has managed to overcome – so inspiring.

In December, I was lucky enough to see her talk in Melbourne. It was like being at a motivational speaking convention. I really wish I’d been taking notes, because that woman dropped so many truth bombs!

If I were Oprah, I’d start a cult. I’m not even kidding. If anyone can run a successful cult, it’s Oprah. And then I’d appoint me her deputy.

“Create the highest, grandest vision possible for your life, because you become what you believe.” – Oprah Winfrey

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Meryl Streep

Is there anything Meryl Streep can’t do? No. No, there is not.

I’ve always been a fan (I mean, who isn’t?), but the film that really won me over was Mamma Mia! (It’s a really good movie – don’t judge me.) Meryl was a treasure in that film.

I remember going to the Sydney press conference for Mamma Mia! and aside from being completely star struck (Colin Firth was in the room, too – you try being anything but star struck), I was blown away by how gracious and graceful Meryl was. People talk about that “X factor” – Meryl has it in spades.

“The minute you start caring about what people think is the minute you stop being yourself.” – Meryl Streep

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Michelle Obama

Aside from her excellent taste in men, Michelle has done so many amazing things during her time as First Lady, most notably for me, her campaign to educate girls, not just in the US, but all around the world.

If I were First Lady, I’d probably just sit on the White House balcony, having high tea all day. I mean, have you seen the view from that balcony?! Neither have I.

She’s strong, smart, confident and inspiring – Michelle for President.

“When you’ve worked hard and done well and walked through that doorway of opportunity, you do not slam it shut behind you. You reach back.” – Michelle Obama

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JK Rowling

For obvious reasons… The way JK managed to turn her life around is – I’m just going to say it – nothing short of magical. One minute she was a single mum, living in public housing. The next, she’s gifting the world with Harry Potter and is richer than the Queen!

If I could sit down with JK, I would thank her for all she’s given us and then politely ask her to stop. Because does the world really need to know what Harry and his friends are up to in their 40’s? Probably not.

“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well have not lived at all – in which case, you fail by default.” – JK Rowling

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Audrey Hepburn

Yes, I know Audrey is dead, but it’s not like any of these other ladies are going to come to my dinner party either… Julie might, but that’s just because she’s got a kind face and would probably feel bad about turning down my invitation. That would be it though!

The way Audrey lived her life – especially in her later years, when she devoted so much of her time to UNICEF – is so inspiring to me.

She really was one of those rare souls who was the whole package – beautiful, gracious, talented, compassionate and kind.

“For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others. For beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness. And for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone.” – Audrey Hepburn

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